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5 Marriage Proposal Don’ts

by Craig

Everyone has their own ideas about the proper way to propose. Most men want the event to be special so that she’ll never forget it (and to improve her chances of saying yes). But that doesn’t always mean things go off without a hitch. In some cases, less is more, and by going completely overboard, all you’re telling the woman of your dreams is that you have no clear idea of the meaning of excess. On the other hand, sometimes just being a guy can work against you. But don’t worry; if you’re not sure if your plan might backfire, here are just a few things you’ll want to avoid when you drop to one knee.

1. Putting the ring in food. Sure, you’ve seen it in the movies, but try to remember that what happens on the silver screen should stay on the silver screen. That world is a fantasy. In reality, what happens when you put a ring in her food or drink is that she’ll probably choke on it or swallow it. And a trip to the emergency room is not romantic. At the very least, it will have to be cleaned before she can put it on. Ring tartar? Gross.

2. Proposing with a ring pop. Sorry, guys, this isn’t as cute as you think it is. If you don’t have the money to buy a real ring, you’re going to have to come up with something a little more creative than one made of sugar. Consider famous literary proposals, such as Edmond’s in The Count of Monte Cristo, in which the poor sailor winds a piece of string around the finger of his beloved Mercedes to signify the real ring he will put there one day when he became a wealthy man. The thought counts more if you actually put some thought into it.

3. Jumping out of an airplane. Think long and hard before you hand her the ring midair; there are SO many things that could go wrong. For example, consider the likelihood of dropping the ring (high risk). Or imagine how the proposal might go. You: Will you marry me? Her: What? You: Will you marry me? (wind howling loudly) Her: What?!

4. Proposing in front of a crowd (especially her family). It might seem romantic to involve others, but this moment is really about the two of you. And do you really want her to 1) bow to peer pressure when she says yes, only to recant later, or 2) listen to the advice of her mother, who hates you? Let her decide on her own, in private, with no one listening but you.

5. Checking out other chicks. This is a bad idea at the best of times, but if you’re looking at other women during the proposal (even if you’re just trying to gauge the approval rating in the room) you might wind up with champagne in your face.

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